Only if for a night

Only if for a night - Florence and the Machine



I could be writing in my diary tonight about how it's been 6 years since my Nana died and how much I miss her. I could be writing as well about how this is the first year I've not had a text from Nhandi saying 'thinking of you'.
But I can't, physically cannot put pen to paper in that gorgeous book and write about how my heart feels it's been ripped to pieces. How much I miss them both.

Instead, I shall direct you to the link above. A most beautiful song which has reminded me of my Nana since MissJ directed me to this song - weirdly, it reminds her of me too.

Now I listen to it and I am reminded of both my N's.... both who were born on the 23rd December and who  both left me in the month of November.

"And I did cartwheels in your honour" - yes yes - I do and I shall.

The tears come freely of late but they are tears of remembrance and of good times past, as well as soul crushing devastation. I'm counting on the belief that those good times will run riot over the devastation and render it to a dull ache in time.

My favourite poem (besides the ever amazing Jabberwocky) is "Remember" by Christina Rosetti. I can recite it verbatim. I'm realising I was quite the morbid child - if slightly unhinged as I forever had a smile on my face.