I wrote a poem

I wrote a poem. No that's wrong. I wrote a piece of prose. Way back when I didn't keep things in. It was about anger and how it attacks the balance. I don't know where it is in the house, else I'd post it. 

My balance is under attack. I want to fight it. Go out in a blaze of thunder. Freak the f*ck out basically. Like I did when I wrote that prose. 

I know I won't. I know I won't kick the living shit out of an inanimate object....I did that when Nhandi died and all it got me was a sore foot and it didn't bring her back. Is that why I no longer fuel the formless beast of anger? Because he's an emotional demon who just makes me sore? 

Anyway. I'm here. I love, I live, I breathe, I hurt. I carry on. 

I like to notice how the writing calms me, I like to appreciate that I can stop actions I wouldn't have before. Oh you've grown little me. Well done. Whoofuckinghoo