Shoes blues

Girls who walk in high heels like they have a carrot or three up their bottoms:

Didn't your mama ever tell you that a lady never walks like that in heels? You glide, you never stomp and you smile, you don't show the agony. And quite frankly, feet should not hurt at 8pm. 11 is a more suitable time. 

But I suspect your feet are on fire and In danger of losing toes to poor circulation, because you have stuffed those poor piggies into shoes FAR too small. They look like a fat chick in a size 8 g-string.