Clan

It was a Friday, same as today.

It was hot as any good summers evening would be - not like today.

But it's the same day.

24 February.

Etched into my head and my heart for all time.

Two girls, different but the same. Laughing and running. Shrieking and holding hands, running back to where they should have been all night.

Today is our day....diary writing, midnight feasting, Lost Boying, 13 13. In unison.

Today is the day we chose each other. To be the ying to the yang.

Today is the day I have to celebrate alone from now on. With my warm cinzano and lemonade.

Love you love

Reality

And finally they come. The gut wrenching, soul wracking sobs you knew were hovering about. 

Your whole body contorts with the pain, your heart cries and your eyes burn. 

Because it's not seemed real up to now. 

You've been treading mud. 

But now the reality has bit you fast and hard. 

She's not here anymore. You've lost them both. 

L_M

There's so much I want to write, so much in my heart that I want to say. But the words won't come. They are stuck.
I know I'm not pushy. I'm not intrusive. I wish I could phone every day but I don't want to impede on family. It doesn't mean I don't care. Maybe it means I care too much. But she is my second mom. She always has been. And I can't imagine her not being in my life. I've tried my very utmost, what's been in my capacity, to do the best by her, especially in the last 4 years.

She's shown me so much.

How lucky have I been to have all these wonderful women in my life. Each have taught me well.