Drama and Breathe

I don't like a lot of drama.... I like busy. Busy is good. But drama is not my scene. I used to make it a New Year's Resolutions (or as I like to call it: A When I can Remember).

The thing is this year has had a lot of drama in it.... and on reflection, I've coped admirably well with it. Events tend to upset/excite you when they happen for the first time or when they aren't a common occurrence.

And this is where I sound up my own bum. But I've been fortunate enough to not have had many instances where people are truly mean to me. This changed this year.

I can say it's been such a year already. 9 months in and it's been pretty buzzy all year around. How many cites? I want to say 8 but I'm not sure all of them are cities. Either way, a lot has been achieved this year and so much great stuff. I feel right. But it's niggling me. That there has also been downright nastiness towards me. *oh this doesn't sound childish at all* But more than that, people MUST know they are being horrid so how come I've only had a very short amount of apologies? As childlike as this blog may sound, we are all adults and therefore, if you've done wrong, and you know when you have, you should make amends, you should say sorry.

So the fact, that grown-big-ass women have treated me badly - makes me somewhat sad or a victim. I'm neither... that's my choice.  However, it does make me as angry as a bee without a stinger. As I've typed above, I know when I've done wrong, when I've hurt another and I'll say sorry. I'm needy like that... or an empath... I'm undecided. I do know this is half the reason, my mouth stays shut a lot - for fear of hurting people.

See, now I only strike when I'm hit first... and I'm still smarting from being struck. And I'm the elephant. And deep down, I know it's only bitter stupid women at the end of it...  people who think they can arse around with my life. And it's too much like school.

As I've typed this and read it back... I've realised, I've proved my own theory on woman who don't work. Today, I've not been busy, I have literally done nothing today in comparison to normal. So I've had time to think and analyse out over stupid things that I'm normally not remotely bothered by. People want to talk behind a person's back... that's fine, they're behind me then. People want to be nasty - what exactly can I do about it?

Blogging - it's like therapy-lite.

And this cat is calm again... and actually, that's probably the issue here. Idiot Folk don't really like it when people are happy or smiley or things are going their way. I wouldn't say it's jealously...but Idiot Folk are happiest when there's a drama they can OOOH and AAAH and "Thank God it's not me" over. I don't like drama.