So I've said goodbye yet again. Or is it a see you around? I think maybe it is. I like to harbour a tiny thought that maybe the chapter is not closed. Or that it's yet to be read perhaps? Who knows. All I know is that, I had a fantastic time. I lived in the moment of that evening and I feel strangely calm about it all.
Oh yes, it's easy to play the 'what if' game. But it might be that is how it works. A continous (ooh that looks like a wrong spelling Ms Gerrard) meeting up and feeling very at ease. We are, as humans (maybe just as females), conditioned to think that there's a fairytale for everyone, that we are put on this earth to find someone to live happily ever after with. But it could be for some people, that's not how their life should be grown. Maybe, and here's a thought, just maybe we sometimes find a person that you feel connected to but only in short spasms of time. You feel it's in you, it should be that happy ever after because that's how everyone does it but it could be that your destiny with that person is for him/her to make you feel special for that period of time. That you live in the seconds of that time, that you enjoy it and you look forward to the next time you meet.
I might be talking a lot of shit but I am glad I lived for the 24 hours, that I have no expectations (this time, my behaviour in previous years states otherwise) and that maybe there will be another time to enjoy someday. Could it possibly be that I've matured enough to look at me and look at the world and see it can be played unconventionally to the norm? That just because most people do their life from a to z, doesn't mean I have to. I can jump to 'l' and then back to 'b' if I wish.
And be of an age when I'm not raging for a missed chance or two but embracing that I had the good fortune to meet such an epic person and have them share some of my favourite moments with. I could pick out a few but I don't think the www should be privy to all my brain.
In the words of Fall out Boy: thnks 4 the mmrs....
Thursday, 19 May 2011
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Maybe you are maturing emotionally. I never imagined it was really possible to do this, and still have moments of silliness when I let my imagination run away with me...but I digress. I am so pleased you have reached that place where you can enjoy someone who means something and can look back with enjoyment and no regrets.
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